We all hit seasons in life where nothing feels quite right.
Every time I’ve felt like I’ve been alone in feeling this way, I call my bestie who confirms that she too has gone through these phases.
You know what I mean?
You wake up and go through the motions, but deep down you feel disconnected from your dreams, your joy, maybe even from yourself.
It’s a strange, unsettling feeling, like wandering in fog.
You know you’re still “you,” but the version you used to know feels far away. It’s so odd how we’ve sent people to space, made so many technological advancements and still haven’t figured out how to decipher these feelings.
For me, it was after a big life change, I’d achieved something I thought would make me happy, but instead I just felt empty.
And honestly, that scared me.
Because if you’ve lost touch with who you are, how do you get back?
The truth is, finding yourself isn’t a one-time thing.
It’s something we do again and again, at different stages of life.
And it doesn’t have to be complicated or dramatic.
Sometimes it’s about making small shifts, choosing tiny acts of courage, and allowing yourself the space to remember what makes you feel alive.
If you’ve been feeling lost lately, here are 7 ways to start finding yourself again.
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1. Give Yourself Permission to Pause
This is super important. I know we value “hustle culture” but sometimes your mind and body just want to rest.
When life feels chaotic, the instinct is often to push harder, work more, fill the calendar, keep going.
But sometimes the only way to hear your own voice again is to pause the noise.
Take a weekend without plans.
Turn off your phone for a few hours. It’s harder to do than it sounds, I know.
Sit with yourself in quiet, even if it feels uncomfortable at first.
I just sat in the apartment with my dogs and spent two days alone with books and ereader, journals, and tea.
That stillness showed me what I’d been avoiding: I wasn’t tired of life, I was tired of never slowing down.
If silence feels daunting, use a guided journal to help ease into reflection. Sometimes you just need prompts to get the words flowing.
2. Reconnect with Old Passions
Think back to what lit you up when you were younger.
Did you love painting? Writing? Playing an instrument? Sometimes the pieces of ourselves we lose are hidden in those old hobbies.
I once took out my Studio Ghibli 1000 piece puzzle and sat at it for 2 whole days. It reminded me that I love working with my hands, even if life had made me forget.
Try picking up a beginner’s watercolor kit or a set of adult coloring books. The goal isn’t to be perfect, it’s to remind yourself of the joy you used to feel.
3. Get Outside of Your Routine
When every day looks the same, it’s no wonder you start to feel lost.
Shaking things up doesn’t have to mean a huge change, even small tweaks can spark something new.
Take a different route to work. I took a different path when taking my dogs for a walk.
Try a new café on your morning walk.
Sign up for a weekend workshop in something you’ve never tried.
I once took a random pottery class just because it was nearby, and not only did I make the wonkiest bowl you’ve ever seen, but I also met someone who I became quite chummy with.
A little novelty can remind you that life still holds surprises.
4. Spend Time Alone Without Feeling Lonely
There’s a big difference between being alone and being lonely.
Sometimes when we feel lost, it’s because we’ve forgotten how to be okay with our own company.
Take yourself on a solo date, coffee, a walk in the park, even a movie night at home.
I once went to a restaurant alone with a book, and while it felt weird at first, by the end I realized how empowering it was to enjoy my own company. It was an easy read so I wasn’t too overwhelmed by reading in public.
You can even make it cozy: light a candle, pour tea into your favorite mug, and curl up with a book on self-discovery.
Create moments that make solitude feel like a treat instead of a punishment.
5. Talk It Out with People You Trust
Sometimes you need to hear yourself through someone else’s ears.
A friend, a sibling, or a mentor can reflect back things you’ve forgotten about yourself.
I remember once telling a friend I felt like I had no direction.
She immediately reminded me of things I’d accomplished that I had completely brushed aside.
That conversation shifted my perspective more than weeks of overthinking ever could.
If you don’t feel comfortable opening up to someone close, consider talking to a therapist. A therapy workbook can also be a good starting point if professional help feels too big a step right now.
6. Try Something That Scares You (Just a Little)
Growth often hides in the things that make us nervous.
You don’t need to skydive or move across the world.
It can be as simple as going to a new class, introducing yourself to someone, or signing up for a local event alone.
The first time I traveled solo, I was terrified.
But by the time I came home, I felt braver, more capable, and more in touch with myself than I had in years.
Even something small — like picking up a public speaking guide or trying a local group activity — can remind you that you’re capable of more than you think.
7. Allow Yourself to Evolve
Feeling lost doesn’t always mean something is wrong.
Sometimes it’s just a sign that you’re outgrowing the old version of yourself. And that’s okay.
Give yourself permission to not have all the answers yet. Write down the parts of your life that no longer feel like “you,” and then jot down the things that still spark excitement.
That list becomes your roadmap.
For me, this meant stepping away from a career path I thought was forever, and leaning into writing — something that scared me but also made me feel alive.
A self-reflection journal can help track that evolution, showing you just how far you’ve come even when it doesn’t feel like it.
Final Thoughts
Finding yourself again isn’t about reinventing who you are, it’s about remembering.
Remembering the small joys, the pieces of yourself you’ve let slip away, and the courage you’ve always carried inside you.
If you’re feeling lost right now, take heart.
This season is just part of your journey, not the whole story.
With time, curiosity, and a little bit of bravery, you’ll find your way back to yourself, and maybe even discover a version of you that feels truer than ever before.
I’d been so scared to start a new business because I felt like the demand was low, but I’m doing it anyway. I’m going to report about it soon!
