Last Updated on March 11, 2024 by Angela Vaz
I went through a pretty rough breakup in early 2021.
It was the first time I had fallen in love with my whole heart and I honestly did not expect the breakup.
It came out of nowhere and I felt like my whole world had fallen apart.
But reading saved me.
It made me fall in love with life and believe in love.
I was able to get back on my feet and that is why I want to share the best books to read after a breakup.
Because these books showed me that life is much more than a relationship.
It taught me to not close my heart but be wiser in the future.
It taught me to put my needs first and really focus on loving myself.
Please give these books a chance.
They will really help you with your breakup.
But before that really quick, get my free guide on how to really reset your life.
This post contains affiliate links, meaning I may make a commission at no extra cost to you if you decide to click on a link and purchase something. Click here to read the full disclaimer.
Does reading help you get over a breakup?
Yes.
Reading helped me understand that a lot of people went through the pain I have.
It made me realize I wasn’t alone and that breakups are natural.
I realized that love is a two-way street and sometimes (no matter how perfect it is in your head), it just doesn’t work out in reality.
These breakup books helped me with 2 things:
- Understand that I had to love myself more
- And that I deserved better
How do I heal mentally after a breakup?
The first thing you should do is cut all contact with your ex.
I have a detailed post on getting past a painful breakup here.
But you should focus on yourself first.
The pain will be unbearable for a few weeks. But it does get better.
Lots of people (including me) have lived through it and come out of it beautifully.
Know that, you will get through this.
If the relationship was meant to last, it would not have come to an end.
You will fluctuate between a lot of emotions including anger, sadness, grief but you will eventually accept the truth and be able to move on.
The idea is to sit with your feelings.
The best way to get over a breakup is to read.
These books helped me overcome the pain I was feeling and each book taught me an important lesson – I was not alone.
Let’s dive in.
7 best books to read right after a breakup
I’ve read and own all of the books mentioned below and I never recommend books that I don’t genuinely love and find useful.
1. You can heal your heart – Louise Hay
This book focuses on 3 problems – getting over a breakup, divorce, and death.
My mum died of cancer 1 month after my breakup, and I was unable to deal with the emotional pain of handling both.
I suddenly felt alone and this book gave me a fresh and new perspective on life.
This book contains several examples and by looking at other people’s experiences, you are able to see your relationship with your ex more clearly.
This book will help you understand what went wrong and make peace with your relationship ending.
It also has multiple chapters on loss – like losing a job or losing a pet.
Reading the affirmations in this book really helped me understand and make peace with my breakup.
I highly recommend this book to anyone who has just come out of a painful divorce or breakup.
2. Getting Past your Breakup – Susan Elliott
This book will teach you everything you need to do and not do right after your breakup like:
- How to cut off contact with your ex
- How to make peace with your breakup, deal with your grief and move past the pain
- How to stop thinking of your ex or checking up on them
Basically, this book will help you move on.
Susan describes her own experiences in detail and then ends them with anecdotes so you can apply them to your own life.
She also urges you to look at all of your relationships (with friends, family, and colleagues) to understand the patterns that follow you so you can start working on them and get some clarity on what you need to fix.
I highly recommend this book to anyone who’s just come out of a breakup.
3. How to fix a broken heart – Guy Winch
What I love about this book is how well it is organized.
Guy Winch first goes on to explain how heartbreak affects us and why it has such a deep impact on our brains.
He explains how our minds work against us and how to fight different types of unhealthy coping techniques like addiction or replaying sad memories in order to move on.
He really goes into depth as to how people are so understanding when it comes to physical pain but not so much with emotional pain.
He covers 2 types of emotional pain – the pain of losing romantic love and the pain of losing a pet.
And then he moves on to how to find the strength to not only deal with this pain but to make a strong attempt to move on and recover from this pain.
His advice is very straightforward but effective.
He also gives multiple examples so that you can take a lesson from each of them.
Please give this book a chance if you have a broken heart.
4. How to Be Single and Happy: Science-Based Strategies for Keeping Your Sanity While Looking for a Soul Mate – Jennifer Taitz
Being single isn’t easy.
It requires a lot of mental strength to navigate a world where a lot of people are in relationships.
It can create several negative feelings at times and Jennifer helps you understand how to overcome these feelings and think differently.
She helps you correct your mindset so that you can attract a partner who is right for you and she teaches you how to find the right person while simultaneously helping you with dating.
She teaches you how to be mindful and really know what you want so that you can find a relationship that you deserve.
She uses multiple real-life cases as examples and this will help you learn better.
I do not recommend this book very early in the breakup but after a couple of months when you feel like dating again, and you want to really make the best use of your single life.
Check out this book on Amazon here.
5. Healing is the new high by Vex King
After reading Good Vibes, Good life by Vex King, I couldn’t wait to read this one.
It came out just when I needed it the most.
This book focuses on healing, period.
Vex King’s writing is very calm, beautifully organized and gets the job done.
This book will bring you peace.
He teaches you how to look into your hurt and examine it so you can make peace with your pain.
This is the fundamental basis for healing – to accept the pain first.
It is very easy to understand and is for anyone who is going through trauma or hurt of any kind.
You can read this book if you have gone through losing someone.
It has multiple exercises in every chapter that are unique (and easy to practice) and I was thoroughly blown away by the progress I was able to make after reading it.
A must-read for anyone who is going through pain and just wants to heal.
6. Love Hurts: Buddhist Advice for the Heartbroken – Lodro Rinzler
Love Hurts is a beautiful book that gives you advice on romantic relationships in a Buddhist manner.
Lodro doesn’t sugarcoat the effects of heartbreak, he dives right into it.
It’s a brutally honest book of what will follow right after the breakup.
Read this book if you’re missing your ex but know that you cannot contact them.
Read it when you feel pain after your breakup.
Lodro recounts his own personal experiences and then teaches you how to go about the breakup but in a calm and mindful manner.
This book is divided into short, well-organized sections that will make it easy to breeze through. He also helps you by giving you certain exercises that will make you think and make peace with your situation.
This is one of the best books to read after a breakup.
7. After the Breakup: A Self-Love Journal: Prompts and Practices to Help You Get Over Your Ex – Lindsey Brock
I know this isn’t a book that you can read.
But I had to add it to the list.
But it is a beautiful journal for anyone looking to get over their ex by pouring out their feelings.
A lot of therapists give this journal to people who have just gone through a breakup, because it is in fact that helpful.
It contains 150 prompts, exercises, quotes and anecdotes all designed to help you tap into your inner strength and get through your breakup.
It is divided into stages.
It will help you out yourself first, process all your feelings and eventually put yourself out there so you can overcome your breakup and feel normal again.
Get this journal, you won’t regret it.
How do I stop hurting after a breakup?
The best way to stop hurting is to start loving yourself more.
At this point in time, you need to love yourself because no one else can do that for you.
You need to start loving yourself and give yourself the attention and time you deserve.
That is the only way you can slowly move away from the pain and reach a point of acceptance.
Loving yourself will bring you peace.
The negative feelings of anger, sadness and anxiety will slowly melt away and you will find love, joy and peace.
I hope these books help you find your way to self-happiness again.
It did work for me and according to me these are the best books to read after a breakup.
Let me know if you enjoyed reading this list or want to add to it!
You might also enjoy these posts:
2 Comments
Hi Angela, I cannot thank you enough for this blog and specifically everything you have written about breakups. I am going through a very difficult breakup now with the man I (still) love while he has been caring for me with a debilitating illness (which I had just started recovering from when he cheated on me). I have sifted through a lot of poor advice on the internet, especially a lot of angry voices that don’t seem to understand how much that love can still linger, even with what he did. I am good at anger – what I really desire is the peace, love, and understanding you bring to each piece you write. Thank you for these book recommendations – I am in the middle of my second one from this list, and I love how they seem to mirror the same patience and kindness you write with. Thank you so much.
Hey Shelby,
First of all, thank you so much for your kind words.
You’re pretty much the reason why I wanted to start this blog. I was going through intense heartbreak myself and I couldn’t find many resources to help me overcome it. I wanted to help people like me who were just hurting. It is very hard to move on because feelings take time to go away. We aren’t on and off switches. We are human.
I’m sorry you’re going through what you are.
And I genuinely understand how hard it must be because I’ve been there. All I know is, that because you loved with all your heart, you will be able to do it again. You will find someone who deserves you and who loves you just as much as you love them. Don’t lose this faith. At the same time, you will also learn to live alone. Until then, make peace with being single. This stage you won’t get again and trust me when I say that you can use this time to heal and get to know yourself better. It’s a wonderful and growing experience.
The books will help give you a lot of solace and wisdom – it did for me and that’s why I want to share them with every person that’s been through the same hurt.
If you ever have any questions or doubts, you can always leave a comment. I am more than happy to help.
Lots of love,
Angela