Last Updated on November 30, 2022 by Angela Vaz
You want to step out but you’re not feeling comfortable.
So you try calling friends but they’re all busy.
Or you’re just not sure it’s a good idea.
Hey, I get it.
I was a single woman for a long time in my late 20s and I had to step out from time to time to maintain my sanity.
It can be awkward, not to mention – unsettling.
In this post, I want to talk about how to go out alone as a woman and feel safe and comfortable.
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How do you go out alone without feeling awkward?
Every time you step out of your comfort zone and do new things, it is going to be a little uncomfortable.
But keep in mind that we as human beings are overthinkers.
Most of the time, however, people are more involved in their own problems and their own affairs.
They’re probably thinking about work, their love lives, or completely random thoughts like why the heck did they buy that new washing liquid that totally sucks and makes their clothes smell like jasmine.
Going out alone is a wonderful way to rejuvenate yourself and get some fresh air.
It’s not healthy to stay indoors 24/7.
You have to step out from time to time.
The best way to go out alone without feeling awkward is to do it little by little each day.
For instance, in the beginning, you can focus on smaller activities, like heading to the bookstore or grocery store.
Slowly, increase the time duration you spend out.
Do more engaging activities like visiting museums, stand-ups, clubs, etc as you build your confidence.
Let’s move on to how you can go out as a woman and be comfortable and safe.
12 things to keep in mind when going out alone as a woman
1. Have a rough plan
Very rarely do I actually go out without having a plan.
I like to have a rough plan in my head that involves where I am going and for approximately how long I’d like to be outdoors.
Make a list of all the things you’d like to do outdoors. It can be a nice checklist like:
- Pick up a toy for my dogs
- Go to the bookstore to check out the new series of books I’ve been waiting for
- Grab a coffee at Starbucks
- Say hello to Rachel since Starbucks is close to her office
- Pick up lunch on the way home
Keeping a plan of all your activities will help you stay organized and methodical.
It will also give you the confidence to be sure of what you are doing when you are outside.
2. Carry a power bank
You never ever want to run into a dead phone battery.
Your phone is your life saver because you can use it for maps, and calling people when you’re stuck in an emergency.
You never ever want the battery to run out.
I carry a power bank in my backpack with me at all times. It has paid for itself.
3. Be stylish but comfortable
You should always be comfortable when you’re going out.
That should be almost everyone’s aim – to wear good clothing that’s stylish but comfortable.
So don’t be afraid to wear big hoodies and oversized t-shirts if you’re super comfortable with them but pair them with denim shorts or leggings.
Wear clothes and shoes that are really comfortable.
If you know you are going to be walking for a long time (especially if you want to explore the city), then wear flats or sneakers.
These are not only stylish but also help motivate you to walk more.
When you’re comfortable walking, you tend to walk more and this will help you stay fit!
If you’re not a fan of shoes or slippers, get wide-fit pumps or comfortable pumps like these.
4. Carry sanitary napkins
If you’re on your period, make sure that you’re carrying an extra pair of underwear and tampons/pads in your bag in a small purse.
This will come in handy even when you’re not on your period and you need to change. I’ve also had random women have accidents around me and need pads/tampons because they forgot to carry one.
So, no matter what the case, always carry your sanitary napkins and an extra pair of underwear.
5. Make nude makeup your best friend
I love nude makeup.
I have a lot of acne and when I’m taking myself out on a solo date, I love wearing nude makeup. I pair that with a bright eyeliner to make my eyes pop.
So, if you love wearing make-up, wear it. Don’t be bashful.
You need to be comfortable and confident when you’re going out – so do what it takes!
6. Put yourself out there
I love starting conversations with people.
Just pay compliments to passersby.
You can tell the grocery clerk that her hair looks nice. Or you can ask someone about a book they’re reading when you’re in a bookstore.
Make it a point to talk to someone when you go out. It will help build your confidence and you’ll become more outgoing.
Talk to people – don’t be afraid to start conversations with people around you.
As an introvert with anxiety, this was hard for me to do at first. But with practice, you get the hang of it.
Try to maintain eye contact. I know it’s hard but it pays off and you may even end up making friends!
7. Park in public places
If you have a car and you’re driving, park in public spots.
If possible, go out during the day.
As much as I hate saying this, it is a fact – the world is not a safe space.
It is always easier to be out during the day. I minimize going out late at night unless I’m with my boyfriend or my friends.
The same goes for walking.
Avoid walking in dark, lonely streets after dark.
Keep to pathways where there are a lot of people.
8. Go to pubs/bars
If you want to enjoy a drink in a pub, go for one!
If you’re not comfortable going to one by yourself, pick a pub that has karaoke so you can watch people sing.
You can also go to clubs where there’s a stand-up happening.
I see so many people eating and drinking by themselves and they’re super comfortable.
I myself have gone and enjoyed beers in pubs while being alone.
So, it’s perfectly alright to go alone – you don’t have to be worried.
Remember these safety tips:
- Never leave your drink unguarded. I usually prefer buying bottles of beer and having the bartender pour it in my glass right there and then.
- Eat a starter while drinking, so as to not get wasted.
- Don’t have too many drinks when you’re alone. 1-2 is plenty.
- If at all, someone is making you feel uncomfortable, talk to the bartender and try to get a cab home.
- Never be afraid to speak up.
9. Join meet-up groups
Look at local meet-up groups. There are apps and websites for this. You can check them out to see if people are meeting near you.
These are so much fun to join and you’ll end up making new friends.
It also gives you a nice healthy space to talk to other people who are looking to make friends and get out there.
You will definitely find people to bond with who share similar interests to you!
Take a stab at it.
10. Be safe
As a woman, it is our duty to be extra cautious.
Carry these items in your backpack whenever you are going out:
- A whistle
- A pocket knife
The knife will come in handy for lots of other things too.
If you have to step out at night or you just don’t feel safe, call a friend and tell them where you’re going.
On Whatsapp, there is a feature called “share your location.” I do this when I’m not feeling too safe and I share my location with my bestie.
Whenever I know another friend is going home alone, I always call to make sure she’s reached home safely.
It goes both ways.
Keep safe, and look out for other women who are close to you.
11. Don’t be on your phone 24/7
It’s so easy to get lost on your phone. But remember why you’re going out.
If you’re going out to reconnect with yourself, then try to minimize phone activity. Use it when absolutely necessary like booking a cab, or checking out the reviews of a restaurant.
If you’re going out to spend time by yourself, then don’t sit on your Instagram feed or chat with friends – remember you can do that anytime.
Right now, you are your priority.
12. Be confident
It’s scary and sometimes terrifying being alone.
But please don’t let the fear of being alone keep you from living the life you want to live.
Find joy in being independent and doing your own things.
It’s a little weird at first, you’ll be terribly self-conscious. But it gets easier with time – I promise.
At some point, you’ll start looking forward to your solo dates!
If you’re outside alone and are thoroughly bored or can’t think of anything to do, read this list of 45 things to do outside alone.
I hope this post gave you the confidence to go out alone as a woman and feel comfortable and safe doing that.
If you have any questions, please leave them in the comments below and I’ll be delighted to help out.
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